Life as Art

Food Art: cooking through the American Vegetarian Cookbook

2010-10-02T16:49:00.000-07:00

Today is the day to stop postponing writing a post. I need a creative project to stimulate the creative juices and i need to blog to keep the accountability to do it. Besides, talking about it helps inspire me to do a difficult and/or mundane. No simple intrinsic motivation here. not a very Montessori thought, but true.

So the project i keep threatening in my own mind (an internal blog, if you will) is to ccok through this vegan cookbook that i purchased many moons ago, The AMerican Vegetarian Cookbook from the Fit for Life Kitchen. You see, i am a bacon lover, hamburger appreciater, and at times a dreamer of a good, medium well done steak. If i can prepare, consume, love and appreciate a dish, then any occasional vegetarian/omnivore should know it is preparable and delish.

Now to push the kitty off my lap, scootch away from the keyboard, step away from things that distract, open up the cookbook, and search for a recipe that i may have all the ingredients and the courage to prepare.

Oh yeah, making a good health decision that could lead to a slimer waist line also motivates.

on a nonhumility note: the above photo i made of my counter, after returning from the farmer's market, the day after i attempted to get Miss Ella Jenkins to sign my baritone ukelele at her concert.

thoughts of a new year: laughter, melancholy & aspirations

2010-01-06T19:10:00.000-08:00

This new year entered with laughter and tears. The day before New Year's Eve, my mom and i drove up to Minnesota to visit my brother and his family and to pick up Gabrielle when she was done with her architecture convention. On New Year's Eve, my brother, Rob, my sisterinlaw, Ann, my nieces, Emma & Katrina, my Mom and I ate dinner of fondue after the nephews, Blake and Carlos, left for the youth group all nighter. The tradition began during a time of vegetarianism in the Mayes household, so we pierced helpless, raw broccoli and cauliflower pieces and plunged them into the fry Daddy filled with olive oil until they turned brown around the edges. I then would dip them into the cheese fondue pot and even the chocolate pot. there was a lot of desegregating with the fondue pots of oil, cheese and chocolate. Originally the veggies were intended for the oil, bread for the cheese, and oranges and bananas for the chocolate. But we fried bread, dipped veggies in chocolate, and tried everything with cheese. it was a good time, even for the purists (cowards).

The girls played hide and go seek, in the dark, with the seeker wearing light flashing rings that Katrina got for Christmas.What a hoot! It was actually suspenseful tip toeing around in the dark, hiding in corners and under covers. Mom stayed hidden the longest under the table, about 5 feet from where the seeker was counting. She was the last to be found, and when i saw her, i was hoping she had intended to be lying under the table. When she began laughing, i assumed all was for the best even when it took her a while to stand up after being still for so long on the hard wood floor. I laughed so had my side ached. We had a fun night.

After a several rounds of chicken foot dominoes, and toasting the new year with sparkling ligonberry juice (only in a land filled with Scandinavian descents), we went to bed. Mom and i were sharing the girls room and began reflecting over the year. She asked me if i could recall what i did last year. I thought i had spent it with David, to whom i was engaged last year and a had a very sad breakup but i couldn't remember the details. with a few prompts from mom, she has such an excellent memory, I recalled a day spent moving David, remembering how well we worked together. That night of bringing in the new year with friends that have twins toddlers and how much we played and laughed and enjoyed each other's company. I realized it was in Minnesota last year at Christmas, being away from David, a friend of a few months that i fell in love with him, that i decided i loved him and wanted to spend my life with him. Too serious , too fast. probably, but emotions, feelings, hopes, dreams seem to rush along after i had tried to keep them tucked away for so long so i could focus on rearing Gabrielle. Since she was a senior and eighteen, the timing seemed so right.

David and i had so many hopes and dreams and promises that washed away with a terrible storm. I can't say that my love for him and all hope washed away with such finality from him. How can one turn off love, even if promises were broken. Even with bad behavior on both our parts. It doesnt matter to me to be more right if im alone.

I struggle to know what to do in this empty nest of this single mother. It seems to be some kinda crossroads, new year, new decade, new relational status,new role of mothering a college student. I desire health and healing and wholeness. Not sadness or busyness. But full life living. I have several ideas,but for now im focusing on the next 40 days of praying intentionally for healing from this breakup for myself and for David, that God will somehow be glorified after a selfish, silly fight and all the drama that came after. We are such fallen creatures, yet we were meant for more. So i seek it now through prayer and fasting meats and sweets, for the most part, vegan.

My not so original idea is to spend the year cooking through a cookbook, the American Vegetarian Cookbook from the Fit for Life Kitchen by Marilyn Diamond. With hopes of health and discipline and the adventure of cooking with different flavors from around the world. Marilyn uses many different spices and techniques i think i can become a better me for having experienced. Plus i do have hopes for better health and less jiggle in the middle. The book is about 2" thick, not sure how many recipes, around 300, and is vegan and i am a bacon lover. The other goal is to spend only $25 a week when im the only one home and $50 when Gabrielle is home.

This all seems some how connected, hide and go seek, melancholy over a lost love, the hope of a future for this empty nester/single gal, the search for greater intimacy with the Creator through prayer and fasting, and better health through better cooking and therefore better eating while staying in budget. I guess it is all connected because it is all me. Here;s to a a better year and a better me!

a new chapter

2009-11-22T15:52:00.000-08:00

This August I had 2 chapters in my life close.

First, my baby girl went off to college. She is brilliant and beautiful and eager to try out her wings. Full time hands on parenting is over and I become a parent from a distance. Still so important, but so diferent.

The second chapter was slammed shut. My fiance and I broke up, unexpectantly and harshly, but necessarily. A great storm came and are relationship did not survive.

Now what? I'm not sure. I've been too busy coping and grieving the closing of these chapters to begin a new. Now it is time to begin something new. I'm hoping to find inspiration and healing through writing and sharing. Lets just see as we chase a bit of blue sky off inthe horizon.

Sink Reflections vs Sink Confessions

2008-10-24T20:08:00.000-07:00

I keep thinking I'm going to force myself to become a better homemaker, mother, teacher, self. Pull myself up from the boot straps kind of mentality. That never works for me!! Confessions is about admitting my wrong doings and promising to try to turn away from them and do them do more. This just makes me have guilt and reluctance. Not much for falling in love there.

Changing my focus to creating, to beauty, to art, like the reference in the goal of the blog's title, is where I need to focus. The FlyLady wants us to focus on the reflection in the sink all shiny and happy. I'll try to focus on the beauty of homemaking not on the failings.

a Love Affair

2008-10-17T19:20:00.000-07:00

For years I have attempted to follow Fly Lady's philosophy of Shining the Sink. The Shiny Sink is to be the beginning ripple of home making, home organization, and the beginning of all good things in my life to follow. For years I have not been able to make this a consistent daily habit. So here I am to begin the Sink Confessions (those of you who know Fly Lady's book will catch the play on the title of her book Sink Reflections). Here it goes, Day one. All the dishes are done. If I can keep from cooking and eating they will stay done. And the sink is shiny.

Since Gabrielle is at the football game with her Dad I have kept busy and moved on to the stove top, the counter, a drawer, and a cabinet. Maybe the Fly Lady IS correct or maybe I am obsessing over my ex husband coming over in a few hours.

I've also been thinking about what Suze Orman says about what you think and say should match what you do. I dream more about being a home maker than I actually spend time making a home. I buy magazines with pretty pictures, I gaze fondly at people's gardens as I drive by, but usually run around busy all the time and then come home and collapse in the middle of my chaos.

Now... now I want to fall in love with my home and make it a beautiful, healthy place for Gabrielle to come home to and to launch out into the world from. The love afair will begin with a shiny sink.

hospital visit and hair style

2008-10-07T15:56:00.000-07:00

I'm readying to go visit my Dad in the hospital. He has an infection that is challenging his kidneys. He was sick, sick, sick. Scary sick. But is getting treatment and is feeling better and then what happens next will be determined.

I feel tired from a day of work with preschoolers/kindgergarteners and a check up for myself. A part of me wants to do my normal routine of staying home and being lazy while feeling guilty about not doing my to do list.

Instead, I have taken a hot bath to get the blood flowing and to feel refreshed. Mom said I should blow dry my hair "because it just looks so pretty" when I do that. I usually would be reactive and defensive--"so when I dont I'm not pretty??" (Idon't blow dry it often.) Mom said I should blow dry my hair after my bath because "You never know who you'll run into at the hospital."

I have taken a bath and dried my hair and may even put on some lip gloss--for myself and for Dad. Dad pays attention to details too. But my pants are wrinkled. Sorry Mom.

Imperfect Hospitality

2008-09-23T16:09:00.000-07:00

Years ago I took one of those spiritual gifts tests and thought my gift was hospitality. Now I'm not so sure. I have lots of clutter, dust bunnies, kitty hair, and an untidy fridg. How can I possibly have folks into my home in such chaos??!!

Last Sunday, I decided to throw caution to the wind and some hot dogs on the grill and invited some friends over after church. I have been wanting to let people into my life from church in order to help build connections but wanted to clean house first. Well, the clean, perfect, tidy(and well decorated) lifestyle wasn't happening. So I'm letting people, and their adorable kiddies into my present imperfect life/house/home.

All went well despite my faults. Thanks Christine and Etolia!!! You make me a better me! I home for more friends over, more connections and more acceptance of the present state of self. Imperfections, dust bunnies and dirty dishes in the sink, and mystery leftovers in the fridg and all.

Life as Art--an attempt at beginning

2008-09-13T21:04:00.000-07:00

I believe in a Divine Creator that designed the Constellation Orion, the Grand Canyon, baby toes, and me. The way I live my life is a response to God's amazingness--His Glory. This I believe is worship and art. Many times my life is random, unintentional, and chaotically messy. This blog is my attempt at being more intentional with serving God, reflecting His glory my life. Especially the small stuff, like the way I drive my car, talk to people, cook dinner, clean the refrigerator.

The way God created the Universe is artistic indeed. The way I live my life will be my attempt of allowing God to create something beautiful in me and through me.

(I got this image from http://www.freefoto.com/images/05/52/05_52_3_prev.jpg I think I have to give credit to the website in order to use it for free. Pretty cool image, eh?)